Behind Bars: Faith's story
by by 5
Summary: This is all about Faith's life in prison. Pleez review and I'll b eternally grateful! R/R!
1. Default Chapter

Behind Bars: Faith's story

Behind Bars: Faith's story

Lost and alone, a sea of unrest, 

A lonely girl's courage put to the test,

No-one understands her, nobody has tried,

Her tough exterior hides what's inside.

Misunderstood, misguided and hated,

A monster inside her has been created,

Hurting and killing, losing herself,

Only one person sees her inner wealth.

Her guardian Angel she can't push aside,

so he helps her push away her hatred and pride,

after trouble with the watchers council and confrontations with B,

she turned herself in and now waits to be free.

She stared straight forwards, unblinking, expressionless, completely motionless. 7 months she had spent in that cell, doing much the same everyday. But behind that expressionless face lay a sea of thoughtful unrest. Soon she would be free…..free!Her heart leapt at the idea before an enormous sense ofloneliness and overwhelming came over her. Free? To go where? Who to? Every she knew wanted her dead. Apart from, perhaps, Angel…….Angel, he was the only one who cared if she lived to see another day. He had always believed she had good in her, even after her numerous attempts to kill him, he had still believed. He understood that behind her hard exterior lay a tortured soul. Only one being in the whole world cares. A tear trickled down her cheek, she didn't deserve to be alive. Her thoughts took her back, back to that night so many months ago. _She could see herself fighting Angel in the pouring rain, her heartbeat was racing, he refused to fight back properly. Why? She remembered fighting with all her might and at the same time asking herself, why he didn't want to hit her, beat her….kill her? Then the horrible realisation flooded her head, making her dizzy: she wanted to die. Not just wanted, deserved to die! It hit her hard like a brick in the stomach, the thing she wanted most in the world was to cease to exist. She was a monster, she didn't want to be this, she didn't want to be here, in this situation. She was fighting still, weakly and desperately. "Kill me!" she had screamed, "I'm bad, I'm bad!" She had collapsed into Angel's arms sobbing with pain. _

A crash from outside her cell brought her hurtling back to reality.

She had been disturbed from her daydreams but it was not long before she lapsed into yet another: _She had packed her bags and was ready to leave, leave Angel's place, he couldn't do anything for her. She met him at the door, he did not attempt to stop her….much. As she walked down the alley he said what she was thinking, 'if she left now she may never be saved'. She stopped turned round and said, hiding her tears, "Help me"._

Faith opened her eyes and hung her head, that was then, at least she'd had someone then, even if it was just one person. But now, she was all alone.


	2. You have a visitor...

Part 2: 

Part 2: "You have a visitor."

She was bored. She was impatient. She was hungry. These were just some of the things Faith had learnt in prison to tolerate and stifle (when she could).Stifling them was very difficult though, she hated talking to the other inmates in their 'recreation' time, she had always been a loner and always would be. Talking was how most of the prisoners kept sane, it was, after all, a lot better than running around the exercise yard or playing on the broken table tennis table. But not Faith, she had other ways of keeping sane. From day 1 until the present day Faith had thought a great deal. In her 'recreation' time she had thought. When she was doing her chores and scrubbing out the toilets she had thought. What she thought about only she knew, her fellow convicts had no idea what went on behind that vacant expression and she was general known as 'psycho chick', of course Faith knew about this but it didn't bother her…much. Sometimes like all of us, she didn't know why she bothered carrying on. Some nights she cried herself to sleep. Sometimes she needed somebody. Everybody needs somebody.

She repositioned herself more comfortably and ran her fingernails across the bars across the top of her cell door. She began humming softly to herself. 

'I wonder what Angel, B and all the Scoobies are doing right now', she thought to herself. After her last meeting with Buffy it had become quite apparent that she was never going to forgive her, she remembered it like it was yesterday,

_ _

_Buffy glared at Angel, Faith sat on the bed trying to think of what to say. "Do you have any idea what she did to me," Buffy said dangerously quietly._

_"Yes," replied Angel coolly._

_"Do you care?" she returned icily._

_"Buffy?" Faith whispered as she hung her head, "I….."_

"Apologise and I will beat you to death" spat Buffy. Faith knew that Buffy would love to do nothing better that just that, she was hoping and praying for something to happen to her, Faith could tell.

"Bitch!" Faith screamed out loud, caught up in the moment.

"Keep it down!" the prison guard shouted from down the corridor. __

Faith wasn't bothered by this in the slightest, "I hate you, you don't understand what its like for me, you won't forgive me and, and.. I don't care!" __

"I'm warning you.." came the voice again.

"I don't care B, I don't give a damn!" she gave a hysterical laugh, "I'm fine see, fine!"

"QUIET!!!!!!" came the much louder voice, " Shut up you loony, just because you don't have any friends doesn't mean you have to invent them!" 

This however did get through to Faith, "PISS OFF!" she screamed before bursting into tears. He was right, no friends. Buffy didn't deserve that, she had cared. She had tried, it was more than some people had done. "I'm stupid", she sobbed, "I'm a stupid idiot."

"Hey!" a voice from outside her door came, startling her, "you've got a visitor."

The door swung open to reveal…Angel. That was good, she loved seeing him but…. he looked…terrible. His eyes were puffy and dull and he looked tired and ill.

"Angel?" she gasped, "what….?"

"It's Buffy," said Angel.

"When isn't it?" snorted Faith, "decided to stop talking to you? Got a new boyfriend? Come on, be more specific!"

"Well its…." Angel continued.

" She's always getting you down isn't she? She hates me, you know. She always will and I mean I tried to say sorry but…" Faith interrupted.

"Faith", said Angel.

"She wouldn't listen and I really did try you know, but I worry sometimes that when I'm free she's gonna try for revenge or whatever and then….

"FAITH!" choked Angel.

"What?" said Faith.

"Buffy is dead", he whispered.

A/N Review?


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